


It's Pizza time

by 1800getstuffed



Series: Spideypool oneshots :) [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bombs, Deadpool Thought Boxes, Don't blow things up children, M/M, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Pizza, Sickfic, Tony Stark being rich, Wade Wilson Takes Care of Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:02:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27243907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1800getstuffed/pseuds/1800getstuffed
Summary: Being given the wrong Pizza?That was inexcusable in Wade's opinion.Someone had to pay.Peter just wants to sleep, OK?Part of a series of one shots hopefully anyway
Relationships: Spiderman/Deadpool, Spideypool
Series: Spideypool oneshots :) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1989160
Comments: 3
Kudos: 69
Collections: Deadpool and Spiderman, Spiderman gay





	It's Pizza time

Peter groans as his stomach twists uncomfortably in pain once again. He jerks his head back as his brain continues to pound, the rhythm of his migraine matching his heartbeat. Perhaps one shouldn’t go out on patrol and fight bad guys when they have a 102 degree fever after all.   
Wade coos as he watches his baby boy whither in pain. It was Stark’s fault to be honest; he’d over worked Petey to his breaking point and now this was the result. Stupid billionaire playboy whatever the hell that line was (author’s note: I legit haven’t watched that movie since 2013 so yeah, I honestly don’t remember how the line actually goes).  
Well, all Wade could think was there would be hell to pay for hurting his little Petey like this.

{Well, that’s not much of a threat}  
/Yeah, Yellow’s right, Stark could literally pay like any bill. We need to threaten him in a way that doesn’t involve money/  
{We could…blow up stark tower?}  
/He’d be able to rebuild it/  
{not if we say, by the land off of him?}  
/Buy-Buy…buy something off TONY STARK how the fuck-fuck-who the fuck…how the fuck are we supposed to pay for that?!/

Wade rubbed his eyes. ‘Can you please shut the fuck up? If a get a headache from you guys, I won’t be able to take care of Peter’s headache!’

{Hmm…Freddy Kruger does make a good point}  
/Yeah, Petey needs to be taken care of at all possible times…I…I wish I had someone to take care of me like that~/  
{What do you me-OH! Oh…oh, well baby, I’ll definitely take of you~}

‘I swear if you guys fuck in my head again-’

‘Wade?’

‘Do you have any idea how traumatising that was?’

‘Wade?!’

‘Like honestly, 100% ten times worse than the weapon X program and believe that shit was messed up like-’

‘WADE?!’

/*Gasp* You woke up Peter! /  
{He was already awake dumbass}

Wade instantly rushed over to Peter’s side, kneeling down on the floor next to the couch. God, the floor was freezing, ah well, he’d put up with it for Petey Pie.  
‘Sorry, I’m probably making your headache worse, huh? I’ll just go.’ Wade whispered, a little heartbroken that he wouldn’t be able to take care of his boyfriend anymore.

‘No, Wade, you’re fine, you weren’t bothering me, I just…I’m kinda…’ Peter’s voice trailed off.

Wade’s eyebrows rose. ‘Kinda what? Tired, angry, sad, happy, hungry, horny, about to kill yourself because you stupidly dated a fuckup like me? What? What are you feeling Peter?’

Peter rolled his eyes, he was getting used to Wade’s self-deprecation now which when he thought about it, probably wasn’t a good thing. ‘I’m a little hungry, yeah…’

The merc sighed with relief. This honestly would have been a really rough time for Peter to have broken up with him. I mean, he couldn’t lie, he did tend to get even more horny during the winter season. 

{He can jingle our bells whenever he likes}  
/Eww, you’re disgusting/  
{No, I’m not, you’re just a girl}  
/{SHE’S JUST A GIRLLL}/

Wade nodded encouragingly. He couldn’t believe Peter was getting embarrassed about being hungry for god’s sake. ‘You want me to pick you up something? Thai, Chinese, Mexican, Pizza-’

‘Yes! Yes, pizza…please’ Peter murmured, snuggling further into his blankets before coughing in a rather distasteful manner.

Wade smiled softly. ‘Let me guess…Peperoni?’

And even though the blanket was covering Peter’s face, he could still tell the arachnid was blushing as he nodded.

***

Wade arrived home around twenty minutes later, carrying a box of beautifully smelling pizza into the apartment. He brought it over to Peter who was still lying on the couch since he was making grabby hands at the food and looking as though he was about to tackle Wade if he didn’t bring it to him quicker.

Peter threw open the lid of the pizza box happily and then…frowned.  
Wade looked at him worriedly. ‘You don’t like Peperoni?’

Peter whined and dropped the box on the ground next to him. ‘You got avocado’ he said angrily.

Wade raised his eyebrow in confusion. ‘No, they said it was Peperoni’. He picked up the box, opened it and…yup, that was avocado. ‘Hmm…So these bastards lied to me, huh? Well, no one lies to this merc or makes my baby boy unhappy like this let me tell you I-’

Peter sighed heavily. ‘Wade’s it fine honestly’.

The merc scowled. ‘It’s not fine, Peter! They disrespected you! You, you’re Spiderman. You go around saving these people’s asses, all they could at least do in return is give you the right fucking pizza!’

Peter shrunk away a little as Wade began to pace the room. He knew he took food seriously but this was just a little much even for Wade of all people.

Wade shook his head, gazing out the window like a Bond Villain. ‘I’ve only got one choice…it’s…it’s all I can do now…’

Peter gave him a quizzical look. ‘Wade…what are you gonna do?’ He asked cautiously. 

Wade starred back at him before smirking mischievously in his most “I’m gonna dress up like the joker and blow up a hospital” kind of way. 

‘I’m gonna blow up the Pizza place’.

‘Wade NO!’ Peter yelled, attempting to follow the merc as he raced out the door but fell on the ground helplessly as his head and stomach pounded even harder. ‘You can’t do that! What did we talk about? Wade? WADE!’

But Wade was already gone.

***

Peter yawned as he flicked through the TV channels, each of them just as boring as the other. He wondered when Wade was going to back, the merc had been gone for hours.  
“Breaking News: What looked to be a man in a red suit and mask has planted six bombs in the local Pizza Hut and demolished the building. Several employees were injured”.

‘FUCKING HELL WADE!’

**Author's Note:**

> This is going to be a series of one shots...eventually.


End file.
